WAHOO!!! I’ve been engaged for 3 months now! (Today marks the day). Wow how time flies! It feels like yesterday I got engaged, and It feels like just a week ago we were just dating. We dated for so long that sometimes I still view Kevin as my boyfriend and not my: fiance, future husband, and life partner. It’ll be us against the world, not to be too corny. But to be honest, it will be. As my future husband, he will come first in my life (behind God of course, but as he has his eyes set on the Lord, I don’t have to worry so much about separating the two). He is my number one, and I his. We will support one another no matter what, and no one, not even friends or family, will ever come between us.
This is all great in theory. This is all great talk and great ideas. But unless you’ve been engaged, you really wont understand what this means. The engaged life is magical! It’s exciting and thrilling, new and intoxicating. But I’m not sure that people really understand what getting engaged means. I get questions all the time asking things like:
“Are you just so excited?”
“Is life just so different?”
“Are y’all just so much happier?”
“Are you just swamped with wedding planning?”
“Do you do anything but wedding plan?
These seem like completely harmless questions to an un engaged individual. And honestly, there is nothing wrong with them! They aren’t rude or mean or even out of line. They all come from a really really good place of excitement and curiosity. And everyone means so well! So I am not by any means upset by these questions! I love being asked to see my ring, to try it on, and all about our wedding and future plans. It’s exciting and lovely to know people care and want to know about my life. What did upset me, was that I felt like I was doing something wrong.
SPOILER ALERT: If you don’t want to know the truth about the engaged life, stop reading here!
With the idea of getting engaged, I believed my entire life would change. I would see the world differently. Subconsciously I believed that any issues we had would disappear. We weren’t going to be that couple that breaks up our engagement, or finds out all the dirty secrets about one another because now we are “stuck together”. We had been together too long. We had grown up together. We knew EVERYTHING about one another. How could we not? Between high school, college, and spending 3 months alone together in Europe, we are about as close you can get. (Think about who you were in high school, how many people REALLY know who you were then. Do you want them to know? Heck no! haha). Why would I believe my life should completely change.
I am still a student, a friend, a daughter, a sister, a business owner, and now a future bride and wife.
I am making a huge change in my life, but that doesn’t necessarily mean my entire life will change. This change I am making is dedicating myself to one person for the rest of my life. Two people will join as one, and I will no longer live my life only thinking about myself and my schedule, my wants and my needs. Conversations Kevin and I had before we got engaged, we have now had to have again. Some of these are not fun. How to split up Christmas, where we will move for jobs, and what we want out of our life. We have already realized how many compromises we will have to make. So while being in love is blissful, it’s not easy. Its definitely worth it though.
So when I was asked these questions, I was worried that I wasn’t “living the engaged life” right. What was I doing wrong, why was life still normal? I then realized that most don’t realize that while it is exciting, your life is still your life, and now you are just planning a major party that will change your life in the future. Yes my life will drastically changed being married. However now, being engaged, my life is still pretty normal, with a couple extra worthwhile stressors 🙂 … And don’t forget the super fun parties!
So for those who were wondering, or just happened upon this post, the engaged life is not what you expect. However, keep dreaming about that perfect guy, that perfect ring and that perfect wedding, because nothing is more fun. (And actually getting to plan it is even more fun).